Early Parole..... But Wait... There's More...

As I sit here this afternoon, 11 days into my self quarantine routine, still trying to process everything that has went on in my life in just one short week.  It's amazing when you're sick and going through a lengthy illness how things can change so quickly day by day, making your life impossible to live normally for any length of time.  It has taken me several days to try to process everything that has happened this week to even give an update, as I am still not sure how I am feeling about it all.

When I last wrote, I was getting ready to start my new round of a different kind of chemo.  A new drug with, what I was told to be a piece of cake, compared to what I had just gone through.  Told there shouldn't be many side effects and I should just breeze through those 12 weeks.  HaHaHa… for those of you who have followed my whole two year journey on here, you know those words were too good to be true.  FYI... Voodoo doll holder still on Kristy's Most Wanted list!  LOL

Week number one - New chemo, new routine.  Basically I added to my prior routine tons of steroids 6 and 12 hours prior to my infusion and I had to now soak my fingers and toes in ice baths during the infusion.  The ice baths are to help prevent something called neuropathy, which basically is a painful numbing sensation in your hands and feet that could possibly last forever.  I was told the ice baths prevented this.  Therefore, I was willing to do anything if it might help.  Anyone who knows me well knows that I am cold ALL OF THE TIME, so the ice bath procedure was not a pleasant thing for me. With this particular chemo you could have an allergic reaction where your body turns hot and your head looks like a tomato.  They said if it was going to happen it would happen within the first 15 minutes of the first infusion.  So they hooked me up and away we went.  Waiting for my head to turn red.  But all went well and out the door we went.  Looks like this would be okay.  I'm not going to react.  Thank goodness.  Side effects with this infusion turned out to be just very tired and the most awful upper GI pain ever.  Felt like my esophagus down was raw.  I took OTC and prescription anti acids with zero relief.  But all in all it seemed like it was going to be no where near as bad as the other chemo regimine.  

Week number two - Normal chemo morning routine.  No pre-meds this time since I didn't have a reaction.  Pack my ice booties and trays, put on my port numbing cream and off we go.  Check in... $20 bucks lol lol.  Then to the lab.  Then to see the oncologist to go over blood work.  White counts were extremely low but not low enough to postpone the infusion, so off to the chemo room we went.  Everyone on the same page, if you were going to have an allergic reaction it would be with your first infusion so you should be good to go.  Hahahaha! About 15 minutes into this infusion I looked at my sister and said "I feel funny".  She looked at me and yelled for the nurses.  All three of them came running over and started pumping shit into me to calm the reaction.  Apparently my head looked like one of those cartoon characters where it turns so red and then explodes.  Awesomeness!!  The nurses quickly got the reaction under control and I was able to do the rest of the infusion without any further issues.  At home during the week side effects were basically the same, extreme exhaustion and the GI issues.

Week number three - Due to the allergic reaction the week before I had to take the pre-meds again as I did during week one.  So basically this week was pretty much the same as week one.  All went well and had my infusion without any issues and was home resting well that evening.  The key word to that sentence is WAS...  haha...  I was sitting on the couch and all of a sudden I felt that same hot feeling I had felt when I had the allergic reaction the week before.  I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and my face was as red as a tomato.  I called the cancer center after hours number and was told to head immediately to the ER.  Have any of you been to the ER at 9:00 at night.  Just that itself is a nightmare, but now add tons of sick people everywhere waiting, which we now know was the beginning of COVID-19.  These people were SICK!  Some of them sitting in the waiting room with oxygen.  I'm sure they were COVID positive but of course then the US wasn't worried about it that much.  I did ask the nurse if these people were being tested for Covid…  she just laughed and said "There are no tests".  This was just two weeks ago folks.  Things have escalated quickly.  But those tests should have been here way before they were!!!  And I had to sit in the waiting room for three, yes three, hours with these people with my compromised immune system from the chemo.  Thank God none of us caught anything from there.  It really is a miracle.  I finally got called into a room and was given tons of steroids, Benadryl, and something to help me sleep and off we went... 3 hours later.  That was a very long night!

Now here's where things get real fun.  On Thursday of that week my doctor's office called and cancelled my normal Monday infusion.  Said that my doctor wanted to see me regarding the allergic reactions.  And scheduled me for Wednesday of last week.  My doctor had been to Africa on a safari and was due back in on Wednesday.  I figured they were going to switch me to a new chemo at that time.

I checked in on Wednesday with my chemo bag and had prepped as if I was getting chemo that day.  Had my labs drawn as usual and then headed back to my doctor's office.  He came in and was masked as a precaution since he had traveled.  He checked my blood work and then we began to discuss the allergic reactions.  Then he said it....  We're done.  No more chemo.  Let's move on to radiation.  I was in shock.  I'd only had 3 and am supposed to have 12.  What if it didn't kill it all.  But I trust my doctor and he assured me that stopping would be okay and that the chemo I had (7 rounds) should be enough.  From that moment until even right now I'm still not sure what to think.  I'm still in shock kind of.  I'm very happy I do not have to have any more chemo, but I'm also terrified I didn't do enough.  But this is where my faith in the higher power and my faith in my doctors will have to guide my fear into acceptance and peace.  I'm still working on that part.  With that being said, I'm done with chemo!!!  Radiation to start in a week.  I will go every single day for 25 days.  I went back to the cancer center last Thursday and got my new tattoos for radiation.  I am now the proud owner of 5 new freckles on my chest to go along with all of my other scars.  They say scars on the body shows how much a person has lived.  Boy have I lived A LOT in the last two years.  I have so many I've lost count!  haha!! So I left the cancer center on Thursday and headed back home to isolation to heal my body as much as I can before we start radiation as my white count was very low on Wednesday, making me more susceptible to all illness, and even more so to this now quickly spreading COVID19.

Saturday afternoon....  vegging on the couch watching TV.  My phone rings.  It's the cancer center.  I could not even imagine why they would be calling and on a Saturday....  It's my oncologist.  My first thought, they changed their minds and I'm going back to chemo.  Ummmm… nope.  He wanted to let me know that he has tested positive for COVID19 and since he had just seen me on Wednesday he had to let me know.  Soooooooooooo…. I am now on COVID19 symptom watch due to direct exposure.  Taking my temperature every hour and every cough I about shit myself praying it's only a cough.  I have a sore throat, but praying that it is just allergies.  You see folks this shit is real.  For those of you that know me... it has now hit close to home.  Stay at home and just veg out and keep the spreading to a minimum people.  I did EVERYTHING I should to not be exposed.  I haven't left my house in 11 days nor have I allowed anyone in.  The only place I went was to the cancer center where they were taking massive precautions, yet here I am sitting, waiting, and freaking out and praying I did not contract it.  Today is day 5.  I have 9 more days and will be in the clear.  Please today say a quick prayer for me and also my doctor and his nurse and anyone else in the office that day!  #shitjustgotreal #rollercoasterride #weekfromhell